http://afroassault.multiply.com/ Yahoo! IM - neo_yahtzee e-mail - thehazrux < at > hotmail.com Thu, 6 May 2010 17:36:06 -0000 Fri, 18 Jan 2008 03:59:35 -0000 http://images.afroassault.multiply.com/logo http://afroassault.multiply.com/ 100 100 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/72/ME_NEED_HELP <img class="alignmiddleb" src="http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a239/djrecon83/molaram7fd.jpg" border="0"><br>Big things going on for me right now; the short but sweet version is: buying a new house, starting a new job, and desperately cobbling together money for said new house.&nbsp; Now, anyone who knows me also knows that I grow weary speaking of such things unless there's some sort of situation involved.<br><br>There is a situation involved.<br><br>Considering that I need to come up with a fairly hefty amount of money in a short amount of time, I need to basically spend money on nothing.&nbsp; Unfortunately, my lovely girlfriend's birthday falls 6 days before the dastardly holiday known as Valentine's day, meaning I have a double shot of "aw, fuck" headed my direction and fast.&nbsp; This is where I call upon the powers of everyone reading this... <br><br>I need help figuring out what to do/get for her.&nbsp; I can probably figure out a gift idea on my own, but I need some ideas for cheap (or free) Valentine's Day ideas.&nbsp; Last year we did a picnic which I could do again this year, although I was hoping for a... http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/72/ME_NEED_HELP Fri, 18 Jan 2008 03:59:35 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/photos/album/12/Oh_boy_I_have_to_think_of_a_title_for_this_and_I_didnt_like_the_last_one_I_thought_of_so_this_is_what_you_get This is why I hate people at http://afroassault.multiply.com/photos/album/12/Oh_boy_I_have_to_think_of_a_title_for_this_and_I_didnt_like_the_last_one_I_thought_of_so_this_is_what_you_get Fri, 28 Sep 2007 17:15:34 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/69/Mulholland_Drive <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/69/Mulholland_Drive Fri, 20 Jul 2007 04:22:10 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/68/Why_I_dont_need_coffee_in_the_morning <img class="alignright" src="http://www.myrmecos.net/insects/Derobrachus1.JPG" border="0">Because one of <a href="http://www.azphotoz.com/images/Palo%20Verde%20Bug%20Framed.jpg">these giant fuckers</a> was crawling in my pants on the way to work the other morning.&nbsp; <br><br>I felt something jab my inner thigh and proceeded to freak out and swerve all over the road after realizing that there was a large insect in my pants (trousers for those that aren't stateside).&nbsp; After smashing the hell out of it and having between 8-10 heart attacks, I was calm enough to white knuckle the rest of the drive to work.&nbsp; Needless to say I wasn't tired anymore, and I made the drive in record time.<br><br>Also, if you're having trouble visualizing how big three inches of beetle is, that's roughly the length of your middle finger.&nbsp; This one was bigger than that.<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/68/Why_I_dont_need_coffee_in_the_morning Wed, 18 Jul 2007 02:35:46 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/24/Just_a_little_too_cool_to_pass_up... I know many of you, like myself, have had an impacted assfull of Gnarls Barkley's "Crazy," but check out this version. Also, tell me the bass player isn't bored off his http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/24/Just_a_little_too_cool_to_pass_up... Mon, 2 Jul 2007 18:10:20 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/67/Holy_Shit Please tell me that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gober">this</a> is just a pile of gober. http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/67/Holy_Shit Mon, 2 Jul 2007 03:05:43 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/23/PFFFFFFFT "Flat D?" Depending on the note you get, maybe "D Flat" would be more accurate. I vote we call them http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/23/PFFFFFFFT Wed, 6 Jun 2007 05:40:23 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/66/Translation_Help Several months ago, I received a very strange text message that was obviously not in English.&nbsp; Usually I'm pretty good at figuring out what language something is in, but this one threw me hard.&nbsp; The first word made me think German; the second sounded Greek; the third one Spanish; fourth was just the letter "q" (which, for some reason, made me think Portuguese); and the last one was like a hybrid word, made out of German, Spanish, spare robot parts and somebody's bones: "k0nteste."<br><br>Here's the message:<br>Dile akel mens0 q k0nteste<br><br>I'm thinking some kind of 1337 speak in Spanish.&nbsp; Maybe "q" is short for "que," but I can't figure out "Dile" or "akel," and when I change "k0nteste" to "conteste" I get a few different possible translations.&nbsp; "Menso" apparently means stupid (hear that, MENSA?).<br><br>Any ideas?<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/66/Translation_Help Sat, 21 Apr 2007 19:39:48 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/64/You_can_all_thank_me_later If you've never played/heard of ROCKSTAR ATE MY HAMSTER or IT CAME FROM THE DESERT, then you better get started or you're going to hell. Also, these downloads are FREE!<br><br><a href="http://www.classic-pc-games.com/amiga/games/rockstar_ate_my_hamster.html">ROCKSTAR ATE MY HAMSTER</a><br><a href="http://www.cinemaware.com/clsgame_itcame.asp?sel=pcexe">IT CAME FROM THE DESERT</a><br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/64/You_can_all_thank_me_later Wed, 29 Nov 2006 08:40:36 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/22/RIP_Michael_Kramer_Richards_Career For those of you who haven't heard, Michael Richards - who played Kramer on "Seinfeld" - lost it onstage at some hecklers in the audience. While this isn't new for comedians (see: Bill Hicks), the subject matter in his tirade was pretty, umm... fucked up. Apparently, he's trying to say that he was just being shocking, but I don't think yelling "nigger nigger nigger" at someone qualifies as "shocking humor." Although, "upside down with a fucking fork up your ass" is pretty shocking. Edit - He made a video appearance on Letterman to apologize, but it was pretty http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/22/RIP_Michael_Kramer_Richards_Career Mon, 27 Nov 2006 21:37:29 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/21/Evangelical_America_hit_by_gay_sex_scandal_US_News_Reuters.com Religion and mansex seem to go together like... well, <a href="http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2006/10/03/MNGSULH7QH1.DTL">Conservatives and mansex</a>. Maybe Haggard was doing research upon which to further establish the organization's anti-gay stance. //"<b>This is a blow</b> as the National Association of Evangelicals is a significant organization for us. We would always want to lift up a high standard of conduct for church leaders," said Gary Ledbetter, the director of communications for the Dallas-based Southern Baptists of Texas Convention.// Interesting choice of words. We'll assume the pun was intended. Of course, <a href="http://www.kxmb.com/getARticle.asp?ArticleId=61986">"you're nothing but a Republican whore"</a> is an interesting choice of words, too. We're in desperate need of some new http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/21/Evangelical_America_hit_by_gay_sex_scandal_US_News_Reuters.com Sun, 5 Nov 2006 02:52:37 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/63/mp3_player_recommendations I don't have much time to type this before "they" get me (actually, I just have to go to work), so I'll get right down to it.<br><br>My iPod Shuffle took a shit on me. No, not literally; it just quit working right. It doesn't bother me too much, as I need something with a bigger capacity anyway, but I've found a new problem: what should I replace it with?<br><br>Unless anyone has other suggestions, I've boiled it down to 2 choices:<br>- <a href="http://reviews.cnet.com/Creative_Zen_Vision_M_30GB_black/4505-6490_7-31632696.html">Creative's Zen Vision M</a><br>-<a href="http://reviews.cnet.com/Apple_iPod_fifth_generation_update_80GB_black/4505-6490_7-32069546.html"> Apple 80GB iPod</a><br><br>Obviously, the iPod has casts a huge shadow on the Zen Vision with its storage, but I'll mostly be using this at work over the course of 8-12 hours, meaning 30 GB is more than sufficient. Also, the Zen Vision has voice recorder and FM capabilities, 2 things that are extremely appealing to me. But... I DO have a lot of music, and 80 GB would be nice to have.<br><br>Does anyone here have either of these items or know of something better? <br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/63/mp3_player_recommendations Mon, 23 Oct 2006 22:35:30 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/62/Im_1 <a href="http://images.google.com/images?svnum=10&amp;hl=en&amp;lr=&amp;safe=off&amp;q=being+gothic&amp;btnG=Search">And #3</a>!<br><br>I can't tell you how bizarre it was to come across that...<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/62/Im_1 Sat, 7 Oct 2006 11:11:23 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/20/Wrestling_for_Jesus In the battle for "most bizarre religion," Christianity just hit a 3 pointer. Come on Islam, step it up a notch! Suicide bombings are SO 1990s. <img src="http://www.wrestlingforjesus.org/roster_r6_c2.gif"> http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/20/Wrestling_for_Jesus Fri, 29 Sep 2006 23:04:36 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/61/Short_story_me I'm feeling saucy right now.&nbsp; I'm thinking tomato sauce, or maybe a Vietnamese plum sauce, or even some type of sauce made out of things that are illegal and smell highly flammable, but saucy nonetheless.&nbsp; In honor of this, coupled with the fact that I've never felt inclined to describe myself as feeling "saucy," mostly because I have no idea what that means, we're gonna party.&nbsp; Not just some boring "strippers, fire, clowns, and at least one visit from an ambulance" party.&nbsp; No, this is a wild, crazy, "hey I'm on the internet by myself" party.&nbsp; I know, be careful!<br><br>The first game of this party is a drinking game.&nbsp; Okay, so it's only a drinking game for me because immediately after finishing this I'm gonna drink until I can't see, but it is a game.&nbsp; Actually, it isn't really a game either since you can't win anything and no one's really competing...&nbsp; but it does involve money, naked girls, and a yacht stuffed with cocaine.&nbsp; Okay, okay...<br><br>Now that... http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/61/Short_story_me Tue, 26 Sep 2006 11:07:35 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/60/Resmartification_the_Quickening For those of you keeping score, I took the Postal exam this morning.&nbsp; Err, umm... yesterday morning (insomnia's back for another round, apparently.&nbsp; Bring it on, beeitch).&nbsp; The "general knowledge" questions I assumed would be there weren't; rather, it was more of a visual comprehension test, followed by a memory test, followed by the "are you likely to wind up shooting coworkers, and if so which ones" psych test.&nbsp; I think I did pretty well... gracias and donkey cheese to everyone for attempting to help my no longer sober and questionably existent soul in its quest to kick yet another obstacle in the face and steal its Lamborghini, only to crash it into a Children's Hospital down the street from one of the Drive-Thru Liquor stores that are so prominent in Phoenix.<br><br>What I'm really trying to say, I guess, is that every one of you is as special to me as getting a full size Snickers bar on Halloween is.&nbsp; I know you shouldn't end a sentence with "is," but that just sh... http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/60/Resmartification_the_Quickening Thu, 21 Sep 2006 10:32:53 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/59/Tell_a_joke_but_screw_up_the_punchline A horse walks into a bar.&nbsp; The bartender says, "why is your face elongated?"<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/59/Tell_a_joke_but_screw_up_the_punchline Fri, 15 Sep 2006 09:31:58 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/19/tarphoid Anybody? Almost looks like Cyrillisch, can anyone http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/19/tarphoid Wed, 6 Sep 2006 09:06:41 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/58/Dear_Internet It's spelled <a href="http://images.google.com/search?hl=en&amp;q=tounge&amp;btnG=Google+Search">T-O-N-G-U-E</a>. http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/58/Dear_Internet Sat, 2 Sep 2006 18:14:56 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/calendar/item/10001/Absolutely_nothing There isn't anything http://afroassault.multiply.com/calendar/item/10001/Absolutely_nothing Sat, 2 Sep 2006 17:35:42 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/18/How_to_stay_awake_while_driving <blockquote><b>"Staying awake while driving can be very difficult and very dangerous."</b></blockquote> Very true. I find it much safer and easier to drive when I'm http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/18/How_to_stay_awake_while_driving Sat, 2 Sep 2006 17:22:07 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/57/Oh_you_think_thats_funny <br> <img src="http://images.43things.com/profile/00/00/df/57112s160.jpg"> <img src="http://www.nndb.com/people/816/000093537/hedberg-crop.jpg"><br>With all the time I spend at work with my headphones on, I can't seem to downlo-- that is to say, I can't seem to buy enough music to keep me entertained. I recently starting listening to stand up comedy all day, but I'm running low on good comedians. <br><br>My personal favorites are both dead: Bill Hicks and Mitch Hedberg, so there's no chance of new material. Whenever I ask people for suggestions, they say the same two people: George Carlin and Dane Cook. Now, I like them both... but not THAT much. That is to say, I haven't really laughed at a Carlin routine for a long time, and Dane Cook just doesn't appeal to me like he does to the throngs of 16 year old girls that devote their myspace page to him and that creepy girl-looking dude from HIM.<br><br>But you guys know comedy. Who is your favorite comedian of the last few decades?<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/57/Oh_you_think_thats_funny Tue, 29 Aug 2006 11:05:26 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/17/Thats_a_damn_fine_question <img src="http://www.canspidersfart.com/images/question.gif"> http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/17/Thats_a_damn_fine_question Tue, 29 Aug 2006 10:07:43 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/56/Celling_Out_yeah_that_was_lame I'm looking for a way to record messages from my cell phone onto my computer for my own amusement.&nbsp; I have a message that is made out of pure gold dipped in platinum, and I really need to get it on here before my lame ass phone company deletes it.&nbsp; I've found some peripherals that would probably work, but I figured some of you tech savvy peoples would know of a much easier/cheaper way to handle it.&nbsp; If I can get it done, you will all reap the benefits.<br><br>So, anyone got a solution?<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/56/Celling_Out_yeah_that_was_lame Mon, 28 Aug 2006 11:35:05 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/55/Request_Need_to_Re-Smartify Years of neglect and abuse through alcohol, drugs and lethargy have left my mental capacity... uhh... not so good.&nbsp; Me feel stupid.<br><br>Anyway, I have a test coming up in the next -- actually, I don't know when it is, but it could be anytime in the next few months.&nbsp; It's a general knowledge test; we'll pretend it's something like the SAT's for the sake of argument.&nbsp; However, my math/english (or is it English?&nbsp; Is "english" a proper noun?&nbsp; See what I mean?) skills are rusty to say the least, and I'd like to polish them up a bit before I take the aforementioned test.&nbsp; I'm looking for any kind of FREE programs/tests online that will at least sweep up some of the dust in my mental attic, but I can't seem to find anything other than the MENSA practice test.<br><br>Does anyone here know of anything to help?&nbsp; Or, if you're particularly bored, I would appreciate any help searching.<br> http://afroassault.multiply.com/journal/item/55/Request_Need_to_Re-Smartify Wed, 23 Aug 2006 07:40:52 -0000 http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/16/16 I just had to share http://afroassault.multiply.com/links/item/16/16 Sun, 20 Aug 2006 03:10:24 -0000